in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
