I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Randomize
