I hate all girls vehemently.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
