Texts From Last Night

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  (512): View more from Texas

  he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.

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  (512): he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success. http://tfl.nu/9rt5
  Replies (11) Good night (6855) Bad night (792)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?

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  (360): on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you? http://tfl.nu/kgxf
  Replies (50) Good night (1697) Bad night (9722)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia

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  (978): I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia http://tfl.nu/pfmm
  Replies (9) Good night (4749) Bad night (1015)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.

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  (604): Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be. http://tfl.nu/j7k8
  Replies (16) Good night (4970) Bad night (1233)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.

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  (540): I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/5p64
  Replies (9) Good night (4551) Bad night (1102)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.

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  (270): Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy. http://tfl.nu/4et1
  Replies (11) Good night (1045) Bad night (3625)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?

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  (248): Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain? http://tfl.nu/gohm
  Replies (10) Good night (2628) Bad night (1201)
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  (916): View more from California

  you want your laptop back?

  (1-916): View more from California

  are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?

  (916): View more from California

  both.

  (1-916): View more from California

  come over.

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  (916): you want your laptop back? (1-916): are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex? (916): both. (1-916): come over. http://tfl.nu/ikpf
  Replies (6) Good night (3501) Bad night (899)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.

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  (701): Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual. http://tfl.nu/sj3h
  Replies (6) Good night (1898) Bad night (1433)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals

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  (651): Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals http://tfl.nu/rxm6
  Replies (15) Good night (4235) Bad night (1436)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night

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  (215): can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night http://tfl.nu/b1z7
  Replies (11) Good night (1321) Bad night (569)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious

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  (914): Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious http://tfl.nu/b9mo
  Replies (5) Good night (837) Bad night (566)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool

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  (403): Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool http://tfl.nu/mskr
  Replies (4) Good night (359) Bad night (633)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul

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  (406): Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul http://tfl.nu/bbxf
  Replies (0) Good night (490) Bad night (360)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?

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  (+44): The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like? http://tfl.nu/ady4
  Replies (2) Good night (216) Bad night (542)

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