so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
