Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize