I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
