no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
