just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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