are you so shy because you have an std?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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