Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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