I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
