it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
