We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You're completely useless in the revolution.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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