wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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