Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
