Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
