So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just threw up on my dentist
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize
