I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
He better not be in your backpack
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
