At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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