I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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