Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
