Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
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he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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