also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
