everyone is single if you try hard enough
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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