Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
