Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
