Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
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i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
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Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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