How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
