I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
should my penis look like a turkey
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
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I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
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At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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