I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
