i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
