How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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