So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
