11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
