I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
