I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
