I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My dick has a subreddit
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
