I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
