Someone shit on the floor
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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