sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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