with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Randomize
