good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
