I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
