Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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