i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
