1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
