I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
