win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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