And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.