I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*