It's like a parade of train wrecks.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
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