There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
